Saturday, October 10, 2015


 It's Daddio's 86th birthday today. I honestly thought he was older than that. It seems he should be.

 We celebrated with sprinkle doughnuts and gingerbread men.

 On my weekly visit we sit outside and read the local papers.

 His nursing home is under the flight path of a small airport so we watch for planes. They get a bit too close for comfort for me but he loves them. He says that when he gets well he's going to be a pilot or an ambulance driver.

 I knit socks while we chat about the stories he reads in the paper. For that short time it seems like he's the Dad I've always had. He never asks to come back home anymore. I think he's forgotten about home. The chaos of this home sadly suits him now.

 I finished the Little Prince socks.

 He said he was tired of seeing me knit them just as I finished them. Good timing. He was very impressed.

 Back inside for dinner things are not so pleasant. His corner of the room is small, his roommate grumpy and the weird goings on of all the other patients is unsettling. The nurses and therapists always stop to ask me how I think he's doing. I always say "I don't know" because I really don't. There is a big disconnect now. I'm just an occasional observer. I'm no longer a participant in his life.

As far as nursing homes go, this one is clean and the staff is friendly in spite of having one of the hardest jobs in the world. If any politician ever complains about our immigration policy they should be required to work 30 days in a place like this. Every one of the people Daddio depends on came from somewhere else not that long ago. They are efficient, compassionate and willing to do the things I am no longer willing or able to do-and for that I am very grateful.
Happy birthday Daddio. If only...


  1. Hang in there! Watching our parents slip away from us is the absolute hardest! When you can catch even the smallest moments of what they use to be, that's enough to keep going. My thoughts are with you.

  2. You have written a beautiful and honest post, my dear.
    It's hard but you are doing it well.
    The socks are just perfect!

  3. Happy Birthday to your Daddio! I'm glad he seems to enjoy your visits and that you get to spend time with him. In the end that is what is the most important. Take care.

  4. Aww Deborah. You are a great daughter. I LOVE THE SOCKS. they are fantastic.
    My mom doesnt' know where she is; she thinks she's at home and that is the biggest biggest blessing possible. I always bring the staff treats. They work so incredibly hard. Happy Birthday daddio

  5. I'll bet he looks forward to your visits! Nice socks and awesome matching job. Is that Opal yarn?