Sunday, June 16, 2019

Two

 This is my second Father's Day without a dad.



I spend a lot of time still thinking about my relationship with my old man because none of it makes any sense to me.



Until my mom died, Dad was just the guy who lived in the house with her. He was never a big part of my life unless he was doing something stupid to upset her. We had no relationship whatsoever.



In fact, I was scared to death of him. He was not an easy person to be around.



After Mom died in 2002 this started to happen all the time. It was one health issue after another and it had to be dealt with and his kids had to do it.




When he wasn't in the hospital recuperating from one thing or another he was lonely so he connected with his "girls" by doing stuff he thought we were interested in.



It worked.



After all these years, all of a sudden we had a dad we could relate to.



And then all of a sudden we didn't.

















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11 comments:

  1. Far Side of FiftyJune 16, 2019 at 1:04 AM

    He made a great effort to connect with you! It takes a special Dad to do that! :)

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  2. DelightedHandsJune 16, 2019 at 8:21 AM

    Yup, you nailed it. What a gift you finally connected with him for a bit. It reminds me of the adage that "it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.' It is when you love that you are vulnerable to the hurt of loss...

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  3. Jeannie Gray KnitsJune 16, 2019 at 12:30 PM

    I've got no words of wisdom but I'm happy that you were able to get a few good years in. Sending you hugs & love

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  4. ShirleyJune 16, 2019 at 1:46 PM

    I am sure you treasure all those memories of time spent with your Dad in later years. Hopefully, remembering the good times will bring comfort.

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  5. Caffeine GirlJune 16, 2019 at 5:31 PM

    What a beautiful and honest post. I think we all can learn a lot by your father's attempts to bond with his girls. It is so sweet to see an older man knitting and sewing!

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  6. Tired TeacherJune 16, 2019 at 11:04 PM

    A beautifully written post.

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  7. BetsyJune 17, 2019 at 1:12 AM

    I'm sorry for the early and the last years Debra, but so glad that you had the in-between ones when you could connect with your Dad. My relationship with my Dad was very difficult too. The last years were the worst and there is no recovering from that. I'm glad we're not expected to understand it all. Huge hugs my friend.
    Blessings,
    Betsy

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  8. WanderingcatstudioJune 17, 2019 at 2:53 PM

    I was always a little envious that Daddio would craft with you. My dad is great and I love him to bits, but we have to do things he enjoys - which means cars, guns or outdoor things - I do like those things, but not quite as much as I enjoy my crafts.

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  9. kathy bJune 17, 2019 at 4:20 PM

    Oh Deb. I am very sorry your heart still hurts from Daddies' roller coaster relationship and illnesses. It is hard when nothing makes sense

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  10. Gemma's personJune 17, 2019 at 4:39 PM

    Hugs, my dad was special to me,always. I miss him and it has been 12 yrs. I am glad you got to enjoy your dad. Sorry you have to miss him now. It is not easy.

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  11. MeredithJune 18, 2019 at 7:41 PM

    Sending you love as you miss your Dad every day not just on Father's Day.

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