Sunday, November 12, 2017

Fifteen

Mom's been gone 15 years ago today. She was 66 when she died from a very aggressive and rare form of leukemia. I'll be 64 in December and that ticking clock never sounds louder than when I think of her and all that she has missed.



 It's been so long now I hardly remember the sound of her voice. The only real memory I have now is the feeling of her hugging me. On one of her last days in the hospital I held her up and we swayed back and forth for a few brief moments while she whispered in my ear for me to take care of Daddio. If she only knew what that promise would mean. These past fifteen years have been such a long, difficult journey. Being a parent to your aging parents is the hardest job on earth.



Hey Mom, this is as old as you ever got. You're my age here. Daddio is growing very old but you never will. He's a real mess but for the first time in ages he has said your name and asked for you. It breaks my heart. It's getting harder and harder for any of this to make sense to me. Maybe one day you'll explain it to me.
Miss you.

Posted by at

11 comments:

  1. Caffeine GirlNovember 12, 2017 at 8:54 AM

    My sympathies. It sounds like your mom was a wonderful woman who was taken from you way too early.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Delighted HandsNovember 12, 2017 at 8:55 AM

    Sending a hug....moments like this are cause for some serious thoughts and reflections.
    Go hug your dad. Sing with your mom.

    ReplyDelete
  3. BridgetNovember 12, 2017 at 9:40 AM

    What a beautiful woman! I know she is proud of you. I miss my mom every day.

    I know she is proud of you. And that she and Daddio love you. Take care.

    ReplyDelete
  4. VeraNovember 12, 2017 at 10:31 AM

    Sending you a big hug. Sounds like she was a special woman. I miss my mom each day.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousNovember 12, 2017 at 2:12 PM

    I am so sorry for your loss ....not only of your sweet Mom, but for the man you ONCE knew. Hugs to you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Judy S.November 12, 2017 at 8:41 PM

    Big Hugs,Deb. You are taking such good care of your dad,and I am certain your mom is very grateful for that. I miss both of my folks and the rest of that generation as well...the sad fact of aging.

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Well Fed WheelNovember 12, 2017 at 11:22 PM

    That memory you still have....of feeling her hugging you....that's a real keeper. Why is it the good ones are always taken so young. You are hugging her back by watching over Daddio for her.

    ReplyDelete
  8. kathy bNovember 13, 2017 at 4:38 PM

    Dear sweet Deb, I am so sorry you lost your mom so young. Such a pretty lady. You have more than kept your promise. I am so glad I have a few saved phone videos of my mom talking to me last year. ITs gobblty gook but it is sweet. Hug Daddio for me.

    ReplyDelete
  9. DebNovember 13, 2017 at 11:03 PM

    My heart goes out to you and I feel your pain. My Dad has been gone for 22 years and my Mom about 2 1/2. I miss Dad but Mom and I were extremely close and I miss her constantly. Mom had dementia the last 5 years of her life so we took care of her and I spoke to her every day.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Chain Stitch CrochetNovember 13, 2017 at 11:35 PM

    I lost my mother at the age of 46 (her) and I was 14 (4 days before my 15th birthday). When I turned 46 I was scared witless the whole year. I breathed a sigh of relief when I turned 47. That was almost 14 years ago. I know that feeling and it's not a good one. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  11. JodiebodieNovember 14, 2017 at 7:16 AM

    Sending hugs and warm wishes to help you through these stressful times.

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)